Childhood Abuse, Emotional Neglect and Complex Trauma (including cPTSD)

Many people seek therapy because they feel stuck in patterns that they can't fully explain. You may struggle with anxiety, low self-esteem, people-pleasing, perfectionism, emotional overwhelm, or difficulties in relationships. You might find yourself constantly anticipating rejection, feeling responsible for other people's emotions, or never quite feeling "good enough," despite your best efforts.

Sometimes these difficulties are connected to earlier experiences of childhood trauma, emotional abuse, emotional neglect, or growing up in an environment where you did not consistently feel safe, understood, or emotionally supported.

Trauma is not defined only by what happened to us. It can also be shaped by what was missing. Experiences such as emotional neglect, inconsistent caregiving, criticism, parentification, feeling unseen, or having to suppress your own needs in order to maintain relationships can have a lasting impact on how you relate to yourself and others.

The effects of complex or developmental trauma often continue into adulthood, influencing self-worth, relationships, emotional regulation, and the nervous system. You may notice that your reactions feel bigger than the situation seems to warrant, or that certain patterns keep repeating despite understanding them logically. This is not a sign of weakness or failure. Often, it reflects the ways your mind and body adapted to help you survive difficult circumstances.

An integrative, attachment-informed approach

I work in an integrative way, tailoring therapy to your individual needs rather than following a single model. My approach is grounded in the understanding that healing often happens within a safe, trusting therapeutic relationship where you feel genuinely heard, accepted, and understood.

Alongside exploring your current difficulties, we may also begin to understand how earlier attachment experiences have shaped your beliefs about yourself, your expectations of others, and the ways you have learned to cope emotionally.

Many of the protective strategies that helped you survive earlier experiences—such as people-pleasing, perfectionism, emotional withdrawal, hypervigilance, or self-criticism—may no longer serve you in the present, even though they once had an important purpose. Therapy offers an opportunity to understand these patterns with curiosity and compassion rather than judgement.

Working with trauma using EMDR and Internal Family Systems (IFS)

Where appropriate, I integrate evidence-based trauma therapies such as Eye Movement Desensitisation and Reprocessing (EMDR) and Internal Family Systems (IFS).

EMDR can help the brain process distressing or traumatic experiences that continue to feel emotionally "stuck." Rather than simply talking about what happened, EMDR supports the natural processing of difficult memories, reducing their emotional intensity and helping them become part of your past rather than something that continues to intrude on the present.

IFS offers a compassionate way of understanding the different parts of ourselves that have developed in response to life's experiences. For example, you may notice a highly self-critical part, a people-pleasing part that works hard to maintain connection, or a part that feels deeply hurt, ashamed, or frightened. Rather than trying to get rid of these parts, we work to understand their protective roles and help them feel less burdened by past experiences.

These approaches can complement one another, allowing us to work not only with insight and understanding but also with the emotional and nervous system responses that often underlie the lasting effects of trauma.

Moving beyond survival

Healing from childhood trauma or emotional neglect is not about blaming the past or becoming defined by it. It is about developing a deeper understanding of yourself, recognising the ways you adapted to survive, and creating new possibilities for how you relate to yourself and others.

Over time, therapy can help you develop greater self-compassion, feel more emotionally regulated, build healthier boundaries, and experience relationships with greater confidence and authenticity. Many people find they are able to move away from simply surviving towards living with a stronger sense of safety, connection, and choice.

If you recognise yourself in these experiences, you do not have to make sense of them alone. Therapy can offer a safe and supportive space to explore your experiences, understand the patterns that may be keeping you stuck, and work towards meaningful and lasting change at a pace that feels right for you. Please reach out if you’d like to discuss how I can help you overcome the pain of the past and move forwards with your life with more balance, peace and confidence.